Tomorrow I go to the hospital at 5:45 in the morning for surgery that will last 18 hours. I have the recurrence of cancer on my tongue, and it's worse this time. Besides losing more of my tongue, and having my neck cut for more lymph nodes, they're going to have to split my lower jaw. I'll have a scar on my face and a titanium plate in my jaw. I'll lose a lower front tooth.
Then, to repair my tongue, they'll take a flap with blood vessels off my arm, and then a flap of skin from my leg to patch the arm. The leg, apparently, is on its own.
And to complete the nightmare add a tracheotomy and a feeding tube through my nose. I'll need rehab to learn how to talk and how to eat.
Besides the fear, I'm so damn angry. I have no risk factors for this kind of cancer. 2 doctors looked at my tongue months ago and told me it couldn't be cancer. Because of them I've gone through months of pain while my cancer grew. It would have been so much easier if it had been treated WHEN I FIRST SAW IT. They didn't listen to me, they wouldn't do a biopsy, even though I'd had this cancer before. Assholes. So now I'm faced with major surgery and a very long recuperation because they just glanced and assumed.